One Heartbeat Away?

Okay, I know it's probably a mistake to introduce my political views onto this blog, but hey, my only visitors at the moment are my friends, and you already know where I stand, right?

So, Sarah Palin finally agreed to answer some questions off the cuff in front of reporters. Okay, to be precise, FOUR questions. Here is part of the transcript (no, I am not making this up, I cut it straight from CNN ) CNN article

Q: "do you agree with the way the Bush administration has handled the war on terrorism, is there anything you would do differently?"
A: "I agree with the Bush administration that we take the fight to them. We never again let them come onto our soil and try to destroy not only our democracy, but communities like the community of New York. Never again. So yes, I do agree with taking the fight to the terrorists and stopping them over there."

     Translation: McCain-Palin want to bring change to Washington. We just want to do it in exactly the same way that Bush has done it for the last 8 years. And, really, I'm still being tutored on how we've handled the war on terrorism, I haven't yet been tutored on how we would do it.

Q: "Do you think our presence in Iraq and afghan and our continued presence there is inflaming islamic extremists?"
A: I think our presence in Iraq and Afghanistan will lead to further security of our nation, again, because the mission is to take the fight over there. do not let them come over here and attempt again what they accomplished here, and that was some destruction. terrible destruction on that day. but since September 11, Americans uniting and rebuilding and committing to never letting that happen again.

     Translation: You didn't notice that I just gave you the same thirty second sound-bite answer that I gave you on the last question, did you? Because we haven't covered this material yet in my tutoring.

Q: "Do you support the reelection bids of embattled Alaska Republicans, Rep. Don Young and Sen. Ted Stevens?"
A: "Ted Stevens trial started a couple days ago. We’ll see where that goes."

     Translation: Oops, I'm going to get in trouble if I answer this one. So I guess, I'm really only agreeing to answer three questions then.

Q: "What do you think of bailout package before congress?"
A: "I don't support that until the provisions that Sen. McCain has offered are implemented in Paulson's proposals."

     Translation: I don't have the slightest clue about the bailout package. We haven't gotten to current events yet.

In other news, Sarah announced victory in Iraq.
( Washington Post )

We laugh, we joke, we watch SNL. And, yet, there are electoral projection maps out there (not even made out by Fox News) that project this as a close race, once that McCain Palin may even be leading. Washington Post electoral map 9/26/08 So I find myself, for the third time in twelve years, asking the question "How can it even be close? How can half this country, my country, see everything completely inverted from me?

Under Contract!!

I didn't want to jinx it until all the contingencies had been removed, but my house is now officially under contract. The only thing that can stop the sale now is if the buyers lose a job, or their bank goes belly-up. A few years ago that might have seemed like a long-shot, but these days??

So in 53 days, we will be homeless. Unless we find something to live in by then. (Do you suppose the homeless shelters take a family of four with a dog, two cats and a guinea pig??) We're looking and looking, but nothing much yet. The rental houses we've seen have been nasty. I think renting our your house is apparently something you do when you're too lazy to clean it or fix anything in it. The apartments are very small and almost none take a dog and two cats and a guinea pig--actually, that goes for 90% of the rental homes too. We're hoping to buy something, so we'll have to see what happens.

Oh, and we're leaving for the Dominican Republic in 22 days!!! I have desperately needed a vacation for over a year. At this point, I don't care whether we have a place to live or not, as long as I get to lie on that beach and listen to the waves. Because if I don't get that vacation, I'll have a place to live--it's called Bellevue, or whatever other mental hospital is near!!

What would I eat?

Okay, I really need a break from all my stress. TS Hanna came and drowned out my Saturday open house. The basement flooded despite the $10,000 we spent on waterproofing last year. Actually it was just one speed drain inside the door at the bottom of the stairwell that wasn't speedy enough. Shockingly, the company came out that night to look at it, admitted that they'd installed it improperly, and is coming out today to re-install.

So, for a fun break, I found this meme from Where's My Cape, and thought I'd join in.

The rules are:
1) Copy this list into your blog, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Bonus: how many did you have to look up? I looked up 11!

And the list:
1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

The house goes on the market today!

Well, we've finally gotten through this stage of chaos. The house goes on the market today.

The wallpaper has been torn down (about ten square feet of it by my and my kids and friends, the rest by the professionals after we realized there was no way we'd get it done) in the kitchen and it's been painted some bleaugh neutral house-for-sale color. It's covered in new granite.

The walls have all been cleaned with Magic Eraser. This makes me sad, because one of March's favorite pastimes is jumping up and slapping the top of the door frame, just like mine was when I was a kid. And I had to erase all those finger prints off the door frames :(

90% of our furniture, knickknacks and stuff has been sold (eBay or Craig's List), given away (Goodwill or freecycle) or stuffed into boxes in the basement.

Our front door has been painted an appropriate Feng Shui red.

The above ground swimming pool has been removed and replaced with a rather odd looking 15' round garden of impatiens and greenage. The grass has been watered. The windows have been professionally washed. The roof has been repaired.

Every light fixture has a brand new lightbulb.

I spent last night craning and twisting my neck, painting the ceiling in the sunroom, where the roof leaked (hmmm, apparently no one told the window washers that they needed to cushion the feet of their ladders when standing on a roof). I didn't fall off the ladder.

Now, comes the worst and hardest part. The waiting and stressing, and keeping your house looking like a Stepford house.

These last few weeks I have not been a good SuperMom. I've spent no time whatsoever with my kids, and have been cranky whenever I've seen them. They started school this week, March started middle school. I've barely heard about it, and can't name their teachers. Quality time with Mommy has largely been me yelling at them not to touch this or that. Sigh, it's so hard to have it all sometimes!